Lifelong Cubs fan comes to his senses

[john]

Mr. John Huera, a Chicago Cubs fan for 30 years, finally came to his senses yesterday. Although skeptical as a boy about things like Santa and the Tooth Fairy, he never waivered in his belief that the Chicago Cubs would bring his city a World Series Championship.

"Years of wanting something to happen so badly clouded my judgement" stated Huera "The t-shirts with the "this is the year" slogans and the preseason hype that happens every spring tricked me into believing that the Cubs could win a World Series".

Mr. Huera now knows this to be impossible. "I've finally come to my senses and a great weight has been lifted from me". "I am now free to pursue more realistic goals, like acheiving level 7 in the Church of Scientology".

[will]

What does it mean if you become a Cubs fan as an adult? Is it like taking up smoking when you are 40?

[bizarro]

More like heroin. Though, in fairness, that's about the age when Charlie Watts picked up his habit. He kicked fairly quickly, though. Of course, it helps to be so rich you can afford to collect cars and not even have a driver's license.